Troilism

Troilism (sometimes spelled "triolism") refers to the erotic interest in watching one’s romantic partner engage in sexual behavior with a third party, sometimes while hidden. [Hirschfeld, M. (1938). "Sexual anomalies and perversions: Physical and psychological development, diagnosis and treatment" (new and revised ed.). London: Encyclopaedic Press.] A common example is a husband watching his wife have intercourse with another man. This scenario is part of the swinger lifestyle, and varies depending on the participants. This behavior may be a form of compersion.

Two of the parties are related, such as a married couple. The third party comes from outside the relationship, and can even be a stranger to the couple. Although the couple is usually separated, it is possible for the third party to be the observer.

Origins

Troilism was first coined in the 1941 edition of "Dorland’s Medical Dictionary" where it was classified as a paraphilia. It was not clear why this scientific name was chosen.

One examination of the word may indicate a root in the French word "trois" (three). A similar French term, triolisme, exists in french - the shift between the third and fourth letter is perhaps a mistake. On the other hand, "ménage à trois" (household of three) was coined in the late 19th century. Although all those terms involve three people, "ménage à trois" implies a romantic link between all three, which is quite different from troilistic scenarios. In French, a "plan à trois", vulgar form and synonym of "triolisme", corresponds more closely to a troilistic scenario; a "threesome".

Another possible origin was noted in [http://www.takeourword.com/Issue093.html Take Our Word For It] ,

cite web
url=http://www.takeourword.com/Issue093.html
publisher=TIERE
title=Issue 93
date=17 July 2000

] a webzine published by the non-profit Institute for Etymological Research and Education. Here, it is theorized that "troilism" comes from Shakespeare's "Troilus and Cressida". In it, Ulysses forces Troilus to watch his lover, Cressida, with another man. Troilus promptly dismisses his former love as a whore. (Prostitution or “acting like a whore” is a common aspect of many acts of troilism.)

Pop Culture References

*American television program How I Met Your Mother. In episode 2x07 ("Crazy Eyes" AKA "Swarley"), Barney recounts a story of dating a girl with "crazy eyes." On their date, she suggests they have a "threesome" with her teddybear, Mr. Weasels. When asked if he went through with it, he adamantly denied it, explaining that they had a "twosome with the third one watching from a chair."

*Garth Marenghi's Darkplace features the character Dean Learner, played by Richard Ayoade, telling his interviewer that he has sat and watched Marenghi making love to a woman many times.

ee also

*Ménage à trois
*Threesome
*Swinging
*Voyeurism
*Sexual roleplaying

References