Turboencabulator

Turboencabulator

The Turboencabulator or turbo-encabulator is a fictional machine whose alleged existence became an in-joke and subject of professional humor among electrical engineers.

History of the Turboencabulator

In 1946 one of the earliest references to the turbo-encabulator appeared in Time on, April 15, 1946 by Bernard Salwen, a New York lawyer working in Washington, DC. Part of Salwen's job was to review technical manuscripts. He was amused by the jargon and wrote the classic description of a non-existent turboencabulator [http://www.time.com/time/magazine/article/0,9171,886972,00.html] .

In 1955 the turboencabulator was supposedly described by a "J.H. Quick" in "The Institution of Electrical Engineers, Students Quarterly Journal" 25 (London), p184 in 1955 [ [http://www.doc.ic.ac.uk/~ids/dotdot/misc/jokes/turboencabulator.txt turboencabulator.txt] ] . (Other sources give vol 15 no. 58 p. 22, December 1944.)

In 1962 a turboencabulator data sheet was created by engineers at General Electric's Instrument Department, in West Lynn, Massachusetts. It quoted much of the above sources and inserted into the General Electric Handbook [http://www.floobydust.com/turboencabulator/ge_turbo-encabulator.pdf] . Perhaps to make the hoax more believable, the turboencabulator data sheet had the same format as the other pages in the G.E. Handbook. The engineers added "Shure Stat" in "Technical Features", which was peculiar only to the Instrument Department, and included the first known graphic representation of a "manufactured" turboencabulator using parts made at the Instrument Department.

Circa 1988 the former Chrysler Corporation "manufactured" the Turbocabulator in a video spoof. See external link in the bottom of this article.

Circa 1997 Rockwell Automation "manufactured" the renamed Retro-Encabulator in another video spoof. See external link in the bottom of this article.

The technical descriptions of all these turboencabulators remain remarkably similar over the years.

Typical technical description

The following quote is from the Time article. "General Electric", "Chrysler" and "Rockwell Automation" use many of the same words. [http://www.time.com/time/magazine/article/0,9171,886972,00.html]

"Work has been proceeding in order to bring perfection to the crudely conceived idea of a machine that would not only supply inverse reactive current for use in unilateral phase detractors, but would also be capable of automatically synchronizing cardinal grammeters. Such a machine is the 'Turbo-Encabulator'.
"The original machine had a base-plate of prefabulated amulite, surmounted by a malleable logarithmic casing in such a way that the two spurving bearings were in a direct line with the pentametric fan. ... The main winding was of the normal lotus-o-delta type placed in panendermic semi-boloid slots in the stator, every seventh conductor being connected by a nonreversible trem'e pipe to the differential girdlespring on the 'up' end of the grammeters.
"Forty-one manestically spaced grouting brushes were arranged to feed into the rotor slipstream a mixture of high S-value phenylhydrobenzamine and 5% reminative tetryliodohexamine. Both of these liquids have specific pericosities given by P = 2.5C.n^6-7 where n is the diathetical evolute of retrograde temperature phase disposition and C is Cholmondeley's annular grillage coefficient. Initially, n was measured with the aid of a metapolar refractive pilfrometer ... but up to the present date nothing has been found to equal the transcendental hopper dadoscope. ... Undoubtedly, the turbo-encabulator has now reached a very high level of technical development. It has been successfully used for operating nofer trunnions. In addition, whenever a barescent skor motion is required, it may be employed in conjunction with a drawn reciprocating dingle arm to reduce sinusoidal depleneration."

Other Turboencabulator information

Many of the companies sometimes mentioned are described accurately. Rockwell Automation does exist, Chrysler survives independently again, after the nine-year merger with Daimler-Benz and most of the brands mentioned (in the case of the Rockwell video, brands or subsidiaries of Rockwell Automation) in the video are accurately described. Allen-Bradley manufactures controls. Dodge Power Transmission manufactures gears and bearings. Reliance Electric manufactures motors, and Rockwell Software is a division of Rockwell Automation. The equipment shown in the original Chrysler video (link below) are a real Chrysler four-wheel drive transaxle and diagnostic equipment, and the newer (Rockwell) video depicts real equipment that can be ordered from Allen-Bradley (as individual parts, however), including the motor control center (MCC) that is being described as the retro-encabulator. The Chrysler video also delves into actual diagnostics, showing real Chrysler dealership test equipment, circa the late 1980s.

The G.E. Handbook was a very large loose-leaf book. New or revised sheets were sent out periodically for insertion or replacement, so it is plausible that some of the sheets actually made it into the handbookFact|date=September 2008

Most generators operate by the "relative motion of conductors and fluxes". On the other hand, the Retro-Encabulator uses the "modial interaction of magneto-reluctance and capacitive directance". As plausible as this may sound to non-engineers, "modial" and "directance" are not even words, much less meaningful engineering terms. Some of the other parts mentioned in the video, (e.g., "differential girdle spring" and "dingle arm") help signal even the technically non-proficient that it is a joke.

References

Usage

*Time; May 6, 1946; An adjunct to the turbo-encabulator, employed whenever a barescent skor motion is required.
*Time; June 3, 1946; If the sackful of mail we have received from you is any indication, the story of "The Turbo-Encabulator in Industry" struck many a responsive chord. Aside from those of you who wanted to be reassured that TIME hadn't been taken in, we received the customary complaints about using too much technical jargon for the layman, observations such as "My husband says it sounds like a new motor; I say it sounds like a dictionary that has been struck by lightning"; suggestions that it "might have come out of the mouth of Danny Kaye," and plaintive queries like: "Is this good?" Wrote one bemused U.S. Navyman: "It'sh poshible." To some the turbo-encabulator sounded as though it would be a "wonderful machine for changing baby's diapers." A reader from Hoboken assumed that it would be on sale soon in Manhattan department stores. Many of you wrote in to thank us for illuminating what you have long wanted to tell your scientist friends.
*The Coe College Cosmos; May 23, 1951, Cedar Rapids, Iowa; "Now I have a brand new turboencabulator with the ... we hope that Jasper ... hasn't scared away all the little tots from future operettas. Seems that he had ..."

External links

* [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pbVY5teBzlg The complete Chrysler video, circa ~1988-1990] on YouTube
* [http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=5125780462773187994 Complete Rockwell video] on Google Video
* [http://www.floobydust.com/turbo-encabulator/ The Turbo-encabulator in Industry]
* [http://www.encabulate.com Retroencabulator website] (contains Turbo-Encabulator text with "Turbo" replaced by "Retro"; does not contain the text from the Retro-Encabulator video)


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Look at other dictionaries:

  • turboencabulator — noun A fictional machine used to humorously point out the perils of excessive jargon in technical writing …   Wiktionary

  • Technobabble — (a portmanteau of technology and babble ) is a form of prose using jargon, buzzwords and highly esoteric language to give an impression of plausibility through mystification, misdirection, and obfuscation. This is not to be confused with jargon… …   Wikipedia

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